The End

Well, we got trounced in the ratings this week. Things aren't looking good. I was walking around the set today, when a gaffer spotted me and screamed. "I'm too young to die," he shouted as he ran off.

Maybe Eldard put him up to it.

People won't even make eye contact with me anymore. They'll be whispering in hushed voices to each other, and then I'll walk in the room, and suddenly, they'll stop talking. The other day, I caught one of the stagehands painting what looked to be blood on my door.

"Just trying to ward off evil spirits, Ms. Sofer," he said.

Sigh... maybe Hope and Faith is looking to add cast members...

Posted by Rena Sofer at 6:02 PM on 3/31/05 | Comments (0)

Never Trust the British

Here's the thing about Coupling: it was probably doomed from the start. I mean, it was a British import, and if there's one thing Americans can't stand, it's things from Britain. Just ask Yahoo Serious.

So I don't see why I should be the one that people always point to as the reason that Coupling tanked. It was England's fault. We tried our best. We even read the lines without those funny accents. It just didn't work. Stop picking on me!

Posted by Rena Sofer at 3:27 PM on 3/29/05 | Comments (0)

Why?

Happy Days is a very popular show. As The Fonz, Henry Winkler becomes one of the coolest guys in America. Everyone tunes into that show on Tuesday nights. It's an institution.

Then, Ted McGinley shows up and it all goes to hell.

The Love Boat is a long-running series. Audiences love the show. It propels Fred Grandy to Congress. It enjoys a decade-long run on ABC.

Until Ted McGinely shows up.

My point is, this guy has ended show upon show after show. But now that he's been propped up Faith Ford and Kelly Rippa on Friday nights when only kids and losers and shut-ins are watching television, we're supposed to forget all about his trail of destruction, from Dynasty to Charlie Lawrence? And yet, people won't stop giving me guff for Coupling?

Where's the justice? Where's the goddman justice?

Posted by Rena Sofer at 1:27 AM on 3/27/05 | Comments (0)

Down But Not Out

OK... the ratings for this week's episode were down a bit. But we're still doing better than NYPD Blue did in this time slot, and the network looks like it's supporting us. Still, I can't help but feel that people were looking at me funny around the craft services table, their eyes judging me... blaming me.

So I'm a little on edge. At the store today, I was stopped by a fan who asked for an autograph. She was talking about what a big fan she was of my work, how I shouldn't let all this talk about me get me down, how I'm going to go on and do great things. I thanked her very sincerely.

"No, thank you," she said. "And I'm sure you'll land on your feet soon, Ms. Marshall."

I threw my six-pack of Tab at her head.

Posted by Rena Sofer at 3:13 PM on 3/24/05 | Comments (0)

Memo to “Just Shoot Me” Fans:

If I get one more comment from one of you noting how I joined the cast of Just Shoot Me just before it went off the air -- which is a complete coincidence, by the way -- I'm closing down the comments section.

Has it ever occurred to any of you that maybe America had its fill of David Spade after seven seasons?

Posted by Rena Sofer at 8:24 AM on 3/22/05 | Comments (0)

Here’s Your Show-Killer

You want a show-killer? Then why aren't you hanging out at Paula Marshall's blog? She's the John Wayne Gacy of show-killers, only without the clown paintings.

Cupid. Hidden Hills. Spin City. Cursed. Snoops. How many shows must this woman bring down from within before she's stopped? How many shows must she kill before you all stop picking on me?

Posted by Rena at 5:04 PM on 3/20/05 | Comments (0)

C.V.

Here's a list of shows I've appeared on that haven't been cancelled:

• General Hospital

&bull: CSI Miami

• Another World

• I Love the '80s

And technically, that shampoo commercial I made a few years back didn't get cancelled. It could re-appear at any time. That's what my agent tells me.

Let's see Ted McGinley match that track record of success.

Posted by Rena Sofer at 4:32 PM on 3/18/05 | Comments (0)

Fear Factor

You know what I absolutely hate? When I walk on a set for the first time, and I catch a glimpse of people eyeing each other nervously the moment they catch sight at me. Sometimes they'll mouth "Oh no!" or "We're doomed!" at one another. Other times, the palpable fear in their eyes will say all that needs to be said.

Like they've never been on a string of shows that were cancelled almost immediately after they hit the airwaves.

Take Ron Eldard. Nice guy, good actor. But to watch him preen around, you'd think that he'd never driven a show into the ground by his mere presence.

For the first couple days on the set, every time he'd see me, he'd say something like, "Look everyone, Rena's here... the pink slips shouldn't be that far behind." Or "I hope Rena doesn't infect us all with cancel-itis." Or "Angel of Death, please spare us from your remorseless scythe."

A real funnyman that Ron Eldard. He's just lukcy no one remembers Men Behaving Badly.

Posted by Rena Sofer at 2:15 PM on 3/17/05 | Comments (0)

“Justice” Is Served

It's so cool that Blind Justice did terrifically in the ratings last night -- 12 million viewers for its first episode! Variety called it a "sturdy start." Sturdy! That's just as good as calling it a hit!

And now that I'm on a hit show, maybe this will stop all this ridiculous talk about me being some sort of show-killer. Boy, that phrase really burns me up -- show-killer. As if Coupling, The Chronicle, Ed, and Melrose Place all withered up and died just because I appeared on them. I'll have you know I made my last appearance on Ed in 2001. That show didn't go off the air until 2004. And while I was on Melrose Place for its final season, so was Alyssa Milano. How come no one ever calls her a show killer? She's got the blood of Who's the Boss? on her hands.

Anyhow, that's all water under the bridge. I'm now on a show that 12 million people watch, that looks like it's going to be a long-running hit. Can Ted McGinley say the same thing?

Hope and Faith doesn't count.

Posted by Rena Sofer at 6:42 AM on 3/15/05 | Comments (0)

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