Hello?
Oh, for the sweet love of God, will someone please pay attention to me?
Posted by diamonddave at 1:12 PM on 3/29/2005 | Comments (0)
Whooo!
Whoooo! Whoooha! Yeeeeeeaaaha!
I've been practicing. I imagine I'd do that sort of thing a lot on my reality show.
Remember, if you're a producer, please call.
Posted by diamonddave at 11:13 AM on 3/25/2005 | Comments (0)
Another Idea
One thing we could do on my reality show is an extreme make-over. My hairline, for instance, could be pulled about six inches forward.
Posted by diamonddave at 2:34 AM on 3/24/2005 | Comments (0)
Attack!
Another good reason for me to have a reality show is because I have an army. I'll bet most of them would watch.
Actually, thinking about it, it's more of a David Lee Roth Division. That might affect the ratings a little.
And they seem to lack the strict disciple you'd expect from military personnel, so the show couldn't be on very early in the morning or after people start drinking on Friday or Saturday.
Probably Sunday, too, now that I think about it.
Posted by diamonddave at 2:11 AM on 3/23/2005 | Comments (0)
Scarves
I was thinking that a promotional item for my reality show could be scarves. Lots and lots of scarves. I've got a bunch if it would to too expensive to buy new ones.
Posted by diamonddave at 4:15 PM on 3/22/2005 | Comments (0)
Why I Am Here
When I signed up with TeeVeePad, one thing they asked me was why someone from the music industry should have a blog on a service for TV stars. And I said, "Did you listen to Van Halen for the music or the videos?"
And then they let me in.
Posted by diamonddave at 2:12 AM on 3/18/2005 | Comments (0)
situation plus comedy!
I accidentally locked myself out of the house naked yesterday, and had a wacky run-in with my elderly neighbor. Sometimes I do that.
I could do it during sweeps, if you wanted.
Posted by diamonddave at 3:12 PM on 3/17/2005 | Comments (0)
Sad and Lonely
I was thinking about "Just a Gigolo" the other day, that maybe it could be the theme to my reality show, and I remembered some of the lyrics:
I ain't got nobody, nobody
Nobody cares for me
Nobody, nobody
I'm so sad and lonely
Sad and lonely
Sad and lonely
And, damn, if that wasn't prescient.
Posted by diamonddave at 1:32 AM on 3/16/2005 | Comments (0)
Title Idea
My reality show could be called "Dave's World," if you're a reality show producer and you need help coming up with a title. I know there was a Harry Anderson show called that a while back, but naming my program the same thing might bring in some viewers looking for re-runs.
If there are copyright problems, we could call it "Diamond Dave's World," but put "Diamond" in really small letters.
Posted by diamonddave at 2:12 PM on 3/15/2005 | Comments (0)
Third Watch
Not many people know this, but I've been training as a paramedic. I've go on ride-alongs and actually got to hold a beating human heart once.
I think that would add a really dramatic element to a reality show about me. If you're a producer, just drop me a line and we can talk.
The heart was beating.
Posted by diamonddave at 11:59 PM on 3/14/2005 | Comments (0)
The Famous Star
Sometimes I forget to take my medicine, and I'll find myself working at Carl's Jr., delivering meals to people at their tables.
Posted by diamonddave at 3:25 PM on 3/14/2005 | Comments (0)
TV
If Ted Nugent gets his own reality show, I think I deserve one, too.
I mean, it's only fair. I should have had one first.
Wait... Was it Ted Nugent who was in Van Halen or Sammy Hagar? I get them confused.
I hope Sammy Hagar didn't get his own reality show, too. Man, that would suck.
Posted by diamonddave at 11:21 PM on 3/13/2005 | Comments (0)
Just being me
I was at the supermarket today, and suddenly -- when nobody was expecting it -- I jumped up on the little conveyor belt and started to dance! I was kicking and high-stepping and mugging and pretending that a pie shell I found was a hat and whoa! Whooohoa! I jumped over the cashier and did a big scissor kick off the bagging area and when the manager asked me to leave, I pretended I was being blown outside by the wind! It was crazy! There's no telling what I'll do! I'm totally unpredictable!
If you're the producer of a reality television show, please call me. Please.
Posted by diamonddave at 3:45 PM on 3/12/2005 | Comments (0)
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