We watch... so you don't have to.
Spiny Terrorists Attempt to Disrupt Election!
As I waited in line to vote today, I managed to lean back into a cactus that the owner of the polling place had helpfully stood where people would be most likely to lean back into it. Quills stabbed through my coat, through my shirt and into my unhappy, pink flesh. I found a bathroom and spent ten minutes helplessly windmilling my arms, trying to dislodge dozens of small daggers unexpectedly planted in my back.
And if there's a better metaphor for an election, I don't know what it is.
