Dear Conan...

We are shocked and saddened to hear that your sidekick Andy Richter is leaving Late Night with Conan O'Brien. He tickled our funnybones on numerous occasions, and his comic presence will surely be missed.

I am sure this is a difficult time for you. And I know this may not be the best moment, but I hope that in the coming months as you search for a new sidekick, you would consider an African American.

LeRoy Miller
NAACP

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Mr. O'Brien,

We are shocked to hear the news that Andy Richter is leaving your show. You may not be aware of this, but you have a healthy following among Latinos, and we will miss him greatly.

It is our hope, Mr. O'Brien, that you might look at a Latino candidate to replace the talented Mr. Richter. We have many worthy candidates in our community. You could make a wonderful statement to your industry by choosing diversity.

Thank You,

Daniel Morales
National Council of La Raza

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Conan,

We are saddened by the loss of Andy Richter from your show. And we are sure when you search for a suitable replacement you will consider an Asian American.

Keith Tachiki
Asian American Arts Alliance

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Mr. O'Brien,

We hope that after Mr. Richter's departure from your show, you might take a look at a Jewish candidate to replace your talented and effervescent sidekick.

Harvey Katz
Anti-Defamation League

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Dear Conan,

Stay loyal to your white blood. It would be a travesty for you to share your stage with someone of mongrel descent.

RAHOWA!

Matt Blockman
Aryan Nation

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Dear Conan,

While the church cannot take an official position, I hope you would consider a Catholic to replace your departing sidekick.

Father Alex O'Grady
Archdiocese of New York

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Dear Conan,

We are sorry to see Mr. Richter leave your wonderful show. We hope the relationship with your next sidekick continues to have the homoerotic subtext we enjoy so much!

Dana Stevard
Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation

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Dear Conan,

Don't you be kissin' no men.

LeRoy Miller
NAACP

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Dear Conan,

I hope for the sake of balance, you will consider a candidate to replace Mr. Richter who is a Republican.

Christine Camp
Republican National Commitee

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Dear Conan,

Remember: once you go black, you never go back.

LeRoy Miller
NAACP

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Dear Conan,

Once you go brown, you're always down.

Daniel Morales
National Council of La Raza

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Conan,

Once you go gay, you go all the way.

Dana Stevard
Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation

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Mr. O'Brien

Once you go Asian... um... We're hard workers, Conan. Very hard workers.

Keith Tachiki
Asian American Arts Alliance

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Dear Conan,

Don't forget, your people stole Texas and California from us.

Daniel Morales
National Council of La Raza

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Dear Conan,

Stole your land? You call that suffering? Conan, my people truly know the meaning of the word. To have a Jewish sidekick on your show would be a shining beacon to Jews still suffering everywhere.

Harvey Katz
Anti-Defamation League

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Dear Conan,

Suffering? How about 400 years of oppression, muthafucka!

LeRoy Miller
NAACP

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Dear Conan,

Suffering? Try 6 million dead on for size!

Harvey Katz
Anti-Defamation League

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Dear Mr. O'Brien,

The white man dropped The Bomb on us, you know. I think we know a little bit about suffering.

Keith Tachiki
Asian American Arts Alliance

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Conan,

Two words for you: Pearl Harbor.

Harvey Katz
Anti-Defamation League

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Dear Conan,

Pearl Harbor is nothing but a Jewish lie perpetuated by that famed Zionist puppet, Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Wake up Conan! Wake up!!!

RAHOWA!
Matt Blockman
Aryan Nation

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Dear Mr. O'Brien,

Due to your silence, we feel you are not taking our cries for diversity seriously. That is why various groups have joined together to bring pressure on you and NBC to diversify your show. We are united in our goal and we will not rest until we see major changes to your show.

The Coalition for Television Diversity
Harvey Katz, LeRoy Miller, Keith Tachiki, Matt Blockman, Daniel Morales, Dana Stevard, Christine Camp

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Mr. O'Brien,

Please do not be offended by the strong stance of my colleagues. I know you will do the right thing, and I know I will happy with whatever choice you make. However, as a Vietnam veteran, I hope you have the sensitivity not to choose a gook as your sidekick. It would be an affront to Vietnam veterans everywhere.

Harvey Katz
The Coalition for Television Diversity

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Dear Conan,

I can live with whoever you choose as your new sidekick just as long as it's not a nigger, a nigger-loving Jew, or any other kind of nigger lover.

Matt Blockman
The Coalition for Television Diversity

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Conan,

Whatever choice you make toward diversity will be welcomed with open arms. However, as you may or may not know, there are certain tensions between the Latino and African American communities. And if you do not pick a black person and you choose to go with a wetback... Well, let's just say that I can't be responsible for your safety.

LeRoy Miller
The Coalition for Television Diversity

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Dear Conan,

I know there is a good deal of pressure on you to make the right decision. And if you cannot go with a candidate who is openly gay, at the least could choose a sidekick who is "curious" about our lifestyle?

Dana Stevard
The Coalition for Television Diversity

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Mr. O'Brien,

I am confident you will do the the right thing whatever ethnicity your next sidekick happens to be. And if you happen pick someone who is Asian, all the better! However, if you do pick an Asian, all I ask is that he not be Korean. Koreans are the Jews of Asia, you know.

Keith Tachiki
The Coalition for Television Diversity

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Dear Conan,

I know you'll do the right thing. However, all I ask is that you not go north of the border and choose a Canadian. Not only would it be an insult to all Latinos everywhere, but the Canadians are animals, Conan! Filthy animals!!!

Daniel Morales
The Coalition for Television Diversity